Our Life
by ebnovotny
Summary: A series of one-shots featuring Clare and Eli's life together. M for various reasons and not all chapters are rated M. Open to suggestions.
1. The Scrapbook

**A/N: Inspiration struck last night when I tried to go to bed too early and then couldn't fall asleep. Then, this little baby story was born. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi. Duh. Just details of this story.**

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Eli Goldsworthy sighed heavily and rolled onto his back, staring up at the dark ceiling. Glancing over at the digital clock to his left, he read the numbers and groaned—2:34. He ran his fingers through his chocolate brown hair and sighed again. It was already 2:30 and he hadn't gotten any sleep. He and Clare went to bed early that night and made love. She was asleep right after, as usual, but Eli had trouble falling asleep for some reason. He glanced to his right and saw the outline of Clare's body illuminated by the light of the clock.

Smiling, he carefully rolled over to face her. She slept on her stomach, her face away from him and facing the wall. Her bare arm rested above the blanket and he reached down to gently stroke it with his finger tips. She stirred and Eli pulled his hands away, not wanting to disturb her. He watched her sleep for a few more moments before pulling the dark covers off of his body and swinging his legs over the edge.

He stood up and searched for the boxers he wore earlier that day. He furrowed his brow when he couldn't find them and opted for the grey pajama pants that rested over his computer chair instead. It was a short distance to the hallway, but he tip-toed it so that he wouldn't wake up Clare. He went into the living room and didn't bother to turn on any lights. He grabbed the remote and turned the TV on, mindlessly flipping through the channels. He finally settled on a movie that he had seen before and he watched it for a few minutes before the TV lights flashing onto something on the table caught his eye.

Leaning forward, Eli picked up the thing that was catching his eye. It was a picture of Clare and himself on the day she graduated from high school. She smiled brightly, her eyes twinkling as she proudly wore her cap and gown. Eli held her from behind, his face hidden in the picture because it was buried in the nape of her neck. She looked absolutely happy. He smiled wide and looked at the table again, noticing a scrapbook.

Eli furrowed his brow and semi-remembered Clare saying something about scrapbooking with Alli. Whenever she started talking like that, against his will, Eli began to drift off a bit. He was grateful, however, that she used it as a creative outlet. Curious, he picked up and opened it.

At first, there were pictures of Darcy, Clare's sister, and Clare. Eli noticed how obviously absent her parents were from these pictures and he made a mental note to ask her if she had spoken to her mother lately. Next came pictures of Clare with the robotics team that she joined when she was in ninth grade. He held back a small snort as he looked at her school girl outfit, glasses, and long hair, shaking his head. Clare was beautiful to him, no matter what, but he was grateful that her appearance changed as her interests changed. She had included a picture where she and K.C. were the focus and Eli resisted the urge to pull the picture from the scrapbook.

He turned the page again and smiled as he saw pictures of Clare with himself now. His eyes raked over the images and he tried not to think too closely about the time he spent in high school, even though it was the place where he met Clare. There were also old pictures of Adam, which reminded Eli that he needed to call his best friend in the morning. The younger man had been in New York the week before recuperating in the Coyne penthouse from another gender surgery.

Eli took a guess at what was coming next and he was correct. When he turned to the next set of pages, he saw pictures of them on the third happiest day of his life. He pulled his knees up and rested his bare feet on the coffee table so that the book was closer to his face. On the day that they got married, Clare was radiant. Her dress was simple—it was Clare herself that made it so beautiful. He smiled to himself as he thought back to that day. They did everything the way Clare wanted, because all Eli wanted was for her to be happy. And even though Clare took her abstinence ring off long before they got married (it was replaced by the engagement ring he got her), they waited until that night, after the ceremony and party, after getting their gifts loaded and dropped off at Eli's parents' house, and after they made it safely to the hotel room that Alli and Jenna decorated for them, to make love for the first time.

"_Eli, you really don't have to do this," Clare giggled as she tightened her grip around his neck._

_Eli shook his head and adjusted her weight in his arms as he tried to open the door to their hotel room at the same time._

"_I can do this. I _will_ do this."_

_Clare kissed his cheek and Eli stopped trying to open the door for a second. He turned his face so that their lips met and nestled Clare between his body and the door. She ran her fingers through his hair and tugged gently, causing him to open his mouth in a gasp. She slipped her tongue into his mouth, surprising him. Their tongues fought for a few moments before Eli pulled back with a groan._

"_I have to get this door open. Now." He shifted her body weight again and finally managed to get the door open. "Yes!"_

_They stepped in and Clare gasped as she looked around the room._

_While Eli and Clare were dropping things off at Eli's parents' house, Jenna and Alli came to their hotel suite and decorated it. The girls filled the room with votive candles and rose petals, something that was a little cheesy in Eli's mind, but the look on Clare's face kept him from making any comments about it. When the door shut behind them, he carefully helped her to the ground, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her into a kiss. Clare placed her hands on his chest and moved them up and down slowly. _

_Eli moaned into her mouth and he slowly ran his hands down her body, resting them at her hips. He pulled their bodies closer together. When most of Eli's clothes were on the floor, he pulled from their embrace and groaned in protest. _

"_Something seems uneven here," he breathed, reaching around Clare's body to remove the dress she put on after taking off her wedding dress. She pulled back and he furrowed his brow. When he opened his mouth to protest, she placed her hand lightly over his mouth._

"_I'm going to the bathroom," she whispered, looking into his eyes. "I'll be out in a minute."_

_Eli kept his eyes glued on her retreating figure until she shut the bathroom door. He took in a few deep breaths to calm himself and finished removing his clothes until he wore just his black boxer-briefs. Swallowing hard, he sat down on the edge of the king-size bed. He heard the bathroom door open and he looked over at it. _

_Clare stood in the door way in matching black lace bra and panties. She smiled softly, but even in the distance Eli could see her nervousness. _

"_Clare," he started, standing again. "You're so beautiful." Even in the dim light, he could see that her face was full with scarlet blush. He walked to her and put his hands on her hips again, his favorite place to rest them. _

_She looked up into his eyes and her smiled faded a notch. She opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out._

"_I know," Eli said, trying to sound soothing. "I'm kind of nervous, too." He leaned down and kissed her sweetly, reaching up and burying one hand in her curly hair. He could feel her start to relax a little into the kiss._

_He led them to the bed and let Clare lay down first. He got on top of her, careful not to let too much of his weight rest on her. He covered her face in kisses, then moved his mouth lower, kissing her neck. Feeling so much naked skin touching quickly turned his kisses from sweet to heated._

_As he kissed further down her body, he could hear her breathing get faster and faster. Her hands made their way into his hair, her fingers wrapping around it. Eli looked up at her and his eyes studied her face, noting a sense of panic, now._

"_Babe," he started. He closed his eyes and couldn't believe he was going to say what he was about to say. "If you aren't ready," he opened his eyes and looked into her deep blue ones, "then I'll stop right now."_

"_Really?" she asked. Her eyebrows rose innocently._

_Eli held back a groan of sexual frustration and nodded. "Of course."_

"_Okay," he whispered. He started to roll off, but she stopped him. She smiled wide now and he furrowed his brow._

"_I don't want you to stop, Eli. I'm ready. Just nervous."_

_Eli felt a goofy, relieved smile on his face and he hid it in the nape of her neck. Clare giggled._

"_I'm sorry," he pulled back to look at her. "I would stop if you wanted me to, but I'm glad that you don't want me to. Really glad."_

_Clare leaned up and put her lips to his, silencing him. He continued to explore her body with his hands. She helped him undo her bra and he showered her breasts with kisses. He took one nipple into his mouth and sucked on it greedily, nipping it gently with his teeth. She whimpered and he moved his mouth to the other breast, giving that nipple the same treatment before his head moved further down her body._

_They were no strangers to foreplay and had both gotten off once before Eli hovered over Clare's body again, this time ready to enter her. He could feel the tension in her body again and he kissed her face sweetly._

"_Relax, baby."_

_She nodded and he guided himself to her entrance and moved forward slowly. Three months earlier, Clare starting taking a birth control pill, so there was no need for condoms and he was grateful for that. Clare wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face in it. Eli's eyes rolled into his head with pleasure and he struggled to keep the pace slow. He moved again and Clare cried out against his neck. He stopped, but she tightened her grip on him._

"_Don't stop. Just go. Slowly."_

_Eli nodded and kissed her shoulder as he moved again, going as slowly as he felt was physically possible. He felt a little resistance and knew what was coming. "I love you," he whispered into her ear as he pushed past her hymen, closing his eyes tightly. Her body tightened and she sobbed into his neck. When he was all of the way in, he pulled out a bit, then went in again, keeping the pace as slow as he could. It was a few moments before Clare started to relax. Her pained whimpers were replaced with moans as she lay back onto the bed, keeping her hands on his neck._

"_Faster," she moaned and, at the time, it was the best thing Eli could ever have wanted her to say. He picked up his pace a little bit and rest his forehead against her shoulder. The friction was bringing him closer to his climax and he was glad to feel that she was gripping the sheets on either side of them, her hips lifting to meet his. _

_He turned his head and started to suck hard on her neck at the place where it met her shoulders, knowing that it would drive her crazy. He reached down between their bodies with one hand and found her clit with his thumb. He circled it feverishly, feeling her walls closing on him. He came and was grateful when she came, too, just a few moments after he did. _

_Eli pulled out and moved to rest beside Clare, pulling her close. "How do you feel?" he asked, his voice low._

_She smiled sleepily and nodded. "Amazing." She looked up at him and cupped his cheek. "I love you."_

_Eli leaned in and kissed her sweetly. "I love you, too, wifey." He smiled wide at the word, loving how it felt leaving his lips._

He smiled to himself as he remembered that night and they honeymoon that followed. They went to the Bahamas and stayed in a little condo that Clare's mother helped them find. Clare included pictures in the scrapbook of this time, too. The camera wasn't out much, but she did manage to get great pictures of the beach and the place where they stayed.

Eli was disappointed to find that the scrapbook ended with there. There was so much more to include that she hadn't, yet. Closing it and setting it back onto the table, he sighed and leaned back into the plush couch. Something else caught his eye, this time to his right. He turned his head and saw a pair of blue eyes peering at him from just above the arm of the couch.

"Oh, crap," he groaned. He stood up and smiled at the owner of the brilliant blue eyes. "Please tell me you're not already getting out of your crib, Hannah." The toddler smiled wide up at him and he shook his head, reaching out for her.

"All right. Come here," he said with a smile. He picked his daughter up and kissed her cheek before turning around and shutting off the TV. He walked down the hallway towards her bedroom. When he opened her door wider, he saw that the side of her crib had been left down.

"Aha. My bad." The little girl giggled cutely, then yawned, causing her father to yawn as well. He placed her into the crib, remembering to raise the side this time. "I won't be doing that again, just so you know."

Eli reached over and immediately wound up the music box on top of her dresser. As the music started to play, Hannah put the tips of her fingers into her mouth, sucking on them as her eyes started to drift shut. He was grateful that that was all it took for the toddler to start going back to sleep. He left her room quietly, leaving the door open a crack. On his way to his own bedroom, he opened up a different door and peeked in on his other daughter. Sarah lay on her stomach as she slept, her body half hanging off of the bed. He would have moved her, but Clare was so much better at that than he was and he didn't want to wake her up.

He shut the door behind himself and finally walked back into his bedroom. As he made his way to the bed, Clare rolled over and looked at him, still half-asleep.

"Heeeeeeey," she slurred. He let out a breathy laugh and got into the bed next to her, pulling her close.

"Hey, baby. Go back to sleep," he whispered as he planted a few kisses on her forehead.

"Are the girls okay?" she asked, sounding more awake now.

He nodded. "They're fine." He decided it would be best to leave out the part about Hannah getting out of her crib for now. He ran his hands down her naked torso to rest at her hips. He furrowed his brow a bit. "Did you put my boxers on?"

Clare smiled and looked up at him. "Yeah, I think so."

"Yeah, I think so, too," he laughed softly. He kissed her cheek and she turned her head to catch his lips with hers. They kissed for a moment and Eli raised his eyebrows when he felt Clare deepen the kiss, her tongue asking for entrance into his mouth. He met her tongue with his and stroked it gently. Her hands came up to rest in the hair at the nape of his neck. Eli pulled away and trailed kisses down her neck.

"Do you want another baby?" she asked, causing him still his lips against her throat. He pulled away enough to look up at her.

"Like…right now?"

Clare shook her head and her eyes were closed. "No," she murmured sleepily. "Just…someday."

Eli smiled and nodded, kissing her lips once more. "Sure. Let's talk about it tomorrow."

He settled onto his back and Clare rested her head onto his chest. Eli closed his eyes and finally fell asleep.

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**I'm thinking about making this a series of one-shots, if I have enough people interested in it. So let me know what you think!**

**~EB**


	2. Touch Me

**A/N: Okay! It's official. I've decided to make this a series of one-shots. Thanks to everyone who reviewed. Your support means a lot. Not every one-shot will be M rated and not all of them will have smut…but this one does. Let me know if you like the smut or if it's too much. **

**The one-shots are all connected (part of the same story), they just don't go in chronological order.**

**Also, the lyrics in italics belong to the song "Touch Me" from Spring Awakening. Such inspiration that show brings!  
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Touch Me

Clare stood against the wall in the dark hallway, her breathing loud in the silence. She huddled as far into the corner as she could, willing herself to disappear so that she wouldn't be seen. It wasn't like her to be so sneaky, but Clare was feeling less and less like herself lately. When Degrassi became more like a prison than a school, part of Clare exploded in rebellion and it affected all aspects of her life. That, coupled with her parents' constant bickering, caused Clare to look at things differently.

When her sister, Darcy, still lived at home, she would tell Clare about how she would try to close her mind off when things got to be too much. It was a technique she learned in therapy. Darcy said that she would put herself somewhere safe in her mind and everything else just went away. At the time, Clare thought she was crazy, but now she was using that technique every day.

Only, it didn't work like Darcy said it did. Sure, Clare was able to, mostly, block out the sounds of her parents screaming at one another. But Darcy never said anything about what happened while she was away in her own mind. For Clare, it was her and Eli. In her mind, they would hold hands, kiss, touch, and so much more. In this secret place in her mind, Clare explored all of Eli's body. She started to become aroused in the real world and explored her own body for the first real time. After that, all Clare could think about was Eli's hands on her body, pleasing her.

_Where I go, when I go there,_

_No more memory anymore._

_Only men on distant ships_

_The women with them, swimming with them_

_To shore._

Clare strained her ears to listen for footsteps. She bit her lip and considered giving up and going back to class when she heard someone coming. She froze, watching down the hall, praying it wasn't a janitor or teacher. She saw Eli's familiar form and she breathed a sigh of relief.

Eli saw her and smiled a half-smirk before heading towards her.

"Hey, Blue Eyes," he murmured, not wanting to be too loud.

Clare smiled at him, her eyes sparkling even in the dark. "Hey. Took you long enough."

"Sorry," he offered. She wanted to know how he got out of class, but was afraid of the answer.

Eli's brow furrowed with sweet concern now. "Are you all right?" He touched her upper arm gently.

She sighed. "Yeah, I'm all right." She smiled sadly. Her parents fought all night the night before and Clare could tell that she looked tired. She wasn't able to sleep, so she texted Eli and they came up with the plan to meet today.

"Did you get the key?" he asked, raising his eyebrows.

She pulled a key connected to a lanyard from out of her pocket.

"I don't know if this is such a good idea. Ms. Dawes—" she started, but was interrupted by Eli,

"Gave you that key because she trusts you."

"And I'm totally taking advantage of that."

Eli let his head fall back a bit before bringing it back up. "Come on, Clare." He moved closer to her and their proximity immediately made her feel heated. He brought up his right hand and slowly trailed it down her arm, his fingertips barely touching her, causing goosebumps to appear all over her.

Clare closed her eyes and sighed softly, wanting to fall under his spell, but she knew this wasn't the place for that. "All right."

She turned around and went towards the door that she knew belonged to an unused classroom that the janitors used as storage. She took the key that Ms. Dawes gave her and unlocked the door. Eli stepped up behind her, his body too close and clouding her mind. Her eyes closed for a moment and she just felt with every nerve of her body. He put his lips to her exposed neck and trailed soft kisses up towards her ear.

Clare smiled wide and shook her head, coming out of her entranced state.

"Be good."

She could feel Eli smile against her neck and then pull away. "Yes ma'am."

When she opened the door, they found the room mostly filled with unnecessary tables and desks. Against one wall, covering the blackboard, were a row of what Clare assumed were supply closets. She shut the door after Eli walked into the room, re-locked it, and then slid the key back into her pocket.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked.

Clare went to an already opened cabinet and opened the door wider, looking inside.

"I don't know what there is to say," she said softly. She closed the cabinet doors but didn't turn to look at him. "I think they started fighting around six last night and it seriously didn't stop until two this morning. I tried to shut them out and when I did, all I could think about was you."

She turned to look at him and he stared back at her with a smoldering look.

"I thought about you…and how I needed your kiss…and your touch." She walked towards him slowly as she spoke.

"This 'zero PDA at school' policy is killing me," he groaned. She could see him struggle with the fact that he wanted to let her take control, but also that he was dying to hold her. She bit her lip, slightly seductively, and watched as he moved closer, making his decision. Clare took in a deep breath and closed her eyes, just wanting to feel.

_Where I go, when I go there,_

_No more whispering anymore._

_Only hymns upon your lips_

_A mystic wisdom, rising with them,_

_To shore._

Eli pushed Clare against the wall with his body, having managed to find a space between two rows of stacked desks, using surprising force. She gasped as her back hit the concrete and she looked up into his emerald eyes, her own containing a mix of fear and lust. Eli's hands rested on either side of her head against the wall and he took a step closer to her. With all of the new rules Principal Simpson had promised came a strict No PDA rule. Clare hadn't realized how much Eli's little touches in school meant until she couldn't have them anymore. With her parents going through a separation, along with all of the other pressures in her life, Clare barely had time out of school for Eli. They came up with the plan to meet in an empty classroom after Ms. Dawes, without Principal Simpson's permission, gave Clare a skeleton key of sorts, trusting her to use it responsibly. She had never thought to use the key in any other way, but Eli convinced her otherwise by constantly putting their bodies in compromising positions when no one was looking, but when they still couldn't do anything about it. She felt a wave of guilt come over her, but she pushed it away as she took in a deep breath.

At this closeness, Clare could easily smell Eli's clean scent—no heavy cologne or anything offensive—just perfectly clean. He breathed heavily a few times, looking back and forth between her blue eyes before leaning in and crushing his lips to hers. Clare closed her eyes and fought to match the pace his lips were keeping on hers. The kiss was hard, harder than what she was used to, but exactly what she needed. She was much more of a sexual being than she ever thought possible, causing her to explore things—specifically Eli's body—with a curiosity that she never knew she had.

Eli put his hands on Clare's shoulders and slowly trailed them down her arms, finally resting them at her hips. He pulled on them, pressing their bodies closer together. Clare reached up and put her hands at Eli's neck, pushing them forward so that her fingers rested in the hair that lay at his neck. His tongue traced a line on her bottom lip and Clare didn't hesitate to open her mouth to him, letting their tongues meet for the first time in what felt like forever. Eli let a moan escape his lips and vibrate against Clare's, causing butterflies to wildly fly through her stomach. He took her bottom lip into his mouth and sucked gently before biting it, surprising her and making her jump. She could feel a crimson blush creep through her cheeks as she looked at him.

Eli widened his eyes slightly and looked apologetic. "I'm sorry, Clare. I didn't mean to hurt you."

She shook her head and smiled bashfully now. "You didn't. It just…surprised me."

He half-smiled and leaned in again. She could feel caution in his kiss and she let out an involuntary groan, wanting to feel him bruise her lips again. Hearing the groan was the only motivation Eli needed. He pulled her close again, using the wall for support and kissed her hard.

They broke away for air. Clare panted loudly in the dark, but Eli moved his lips to her neck, trailing wet kisses up and down it. He attached his mouth to the spot where her neck met her shoulders and sucked gently, careful not to leave a mark on her. Clare didn't think. Her mind was too clouded. She just let herself react.

"Touch me."

Eli continued to kiss on her neck as if he hadn't heard her.

"_Touch me_," she said again, emphasizing her need with her voice.

She felt him hesitate briefly before continuing to kiss on her neck, moving up towards her ear. One hand moved from her back towards the front, moving upward at the same time. He gently placed his hand on her breast through her purple uniform polo and gave it a small squeeze. They moaned in unison and Clare felt herself blush again. He squeezed it again and again until Clare was no longer satisfied with such little contact. She slowly pushed him back and looked into his eyes. With a newfound confidence, she reached down and un-tucked her polo, pulling it over her head and resting it on a nearby desk. She could see his shoulders rise with each quick breath that he took. She just smiled and pulled him close again.

Eli did not hesitate this time. He kissed her on the lips and put his hand to her breast again, squeezing it. He let his thumb run across the bare skin on the top of her breast where her bra didn't cover. His thumb dipped in and ran gently across her nipple, causing her to moan. He did it again, smiling against her lips. Clare's face felt hot, but she did not want Eli to stop touching her this way—she only wanted more. As if he could hear her thoughts, Eli pulled the right side of her bra down, exposing her nipple to the cool air in the classroom. He pulled his lips from hers and looked into her eyes for a moment before leaning down and kissing on her chest. He kissed lower until her reached her nipple, sticking his tongue out to flick it when he did. Clare whimpered and put her head back against the wall, her eyes closed.

"Eli," she moaned, shaking her head slightly. But Clare didn't want him to stop. She just wanted him to quit teasing her. He licked her nipple again before putting it into his mouth and sucking on it. He kissed back up to her mouth and rolled his thumb over her nipple a few times. Eli pushed his body against hers and she could feel that he was hard against her thigh. Without thinking, she ground his body against his. He gasped against her lips, opening his eyes wide.

_Where I go, when I go there,_

_No more shadows anymore._

_Only men with golden fins_

_The rhythm in them, rocking with them,_

_To shore._

Clare thrust herself against Eli again, enjoying getting that reaction out of him. He reached down and put his fingers against her. When she rubbed up against his fingers, she could feel them brush up against her clit through the fabric. Now her eyes were wide as she felt that pleasure, wanting much more of it. Eli turned his hand, cupping it to her sex, moving his fingers gently against it. She felt his eyes on her before she felt him undo her pants. With her good judgment clouded, she allowed him to do this. He reached into her pants and felt her through her underwear. Clare blushed, knowing he could feel how wet she was. But he didn't seem to mind. He moved his fingers against her in slow circles, his eyes on her face, watching her. She bit her lip and tried her best to control the faces she was making. But his fingers were agonizing on her. She opened her eyes and looked into his, finding question in them. She furrowed her brow a bit before feeling him slip his fingers into her modest panties.

Clare widened her eyes and her shallow breathing made her slightly light-headed. Eli's lower lip went between his teeth as he felt her, fingers to bare flesh. He ran his middle finger up and down her slit before stopping at her clit. He expertly rubbed circles around it, still watching her reactions.

"You're so beautiful, Clare. Fuck."

Clare could only moan in response. She felt her blood coming to a boil, all of her nerves hyper-sensitive. It was a feeling she had become used to only recently, when she would go to that special place in her mind. Clare never thought of touching herself until the "vibrator situation" with Alli. And she never actually touched herself with purpose until she met Eli.

Moments later, she felt her body tense up. Eli must have felt it, too. He put his middle finger inside of her, thrusting in and out, and continued to rub her clit with his thumb. He pushed himself against her, supporting her body between himself in the wall. Clare came more quickly than she expected and moaned Eli's name over and over as she did. She rested her head on his shoulder and took a few moments to recompose herself. Eli pulled his hand out and fixed Clare's pants. He put his lips to her neck and kissed her sweetly now.

Clare opened her eyes to look at him and he looked back with his green ones, a slight mischievous look in them. She blushed and kissed his lips.

"That was—," she started, but stopped when he nodded.

"I know." He smiled wide now and Clare found it extremely cocky. He hugged her close and she could feel him against her again, hard on her thigh. She pulled from him slightly and looked at his face before reaching down and grabbing him carefully though his pants. Eli looked at her with wide eyes and it was her chance to smile playfully. She turned their bodies so that Eli's back was now against the wall. She had never seen him look so…small, surprised. He looked almost innocent. But Clare knew better. She didn't waste any time undoing Eli's belt buckle and unzipping his pants.

Clare stopped just short of reaching into Eli's underwear. She swallowed hard and the weight of her decisions caught up with her, her conscience starting to come back into control. She took a step backwards and looked at Eli's face. His head was back against the wall, his eyes closed and his mouth slightly open. When he realized that nothing was happening, he lifted his head and looked at her, his brow furrowed cutely.

"A-…are you o-ok?" he stuttered, trying to calm his breathing.

Clare nodded, a small smiled reforming on her face.

_Where I go, when I go there,_

_No more weeping anymore._

_Only in and out your lips_

_The broken wishes, washing with them,_

_To shore._

Clare reached in and wrapped her hands around Eli's cock, really feeling it for the first time. He gasped and she relished in the sound, wanting to hear him make the sound again. She touched him experimentally, loving the way it made his body move beneath her touch. His hand came up to grip her arm and she knew he was close. When Eli came, his knees buckled beneath him and he slid to the ground. Clare went with him, wiping her hand on the wall behind them.

It was a few moments before Eli really moved again. He fixed his pants, not bothering to tuck his shirt in, then rested his head on Clare's bare shoulder. Another minute later, he pulled back and kissed her sweetly on the lips.

"Thank you," he murmured against them, causing her to blush.

"We should get back to class."

Eli didn't protest and kissed her again. He got up and helped her up, retrieving her shirt and handing it to her. He smiled wide as he watched her put it back on.

"I drive you all kinds of crazy, don't I?" he asked.

Clare narrowed her eyes, but knew he was right. She could feel that her lips were swollen and her hair was a mess. She tucked in her shirt and watched as he did the same.

"Come on, _Elijah_. Let's get out of here before we get caught."

She unlocked the door and Eli stopped her before she could open it. He put his hands on her hips and kissed her passionately, fogging up her mind again. Before she could really react, he pulled away, a smug smile on his face.

"See you after school, Edwards."

He left, leaving her gasping for breath.

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**Thanks for reading! I am more than open to suggestions or requests. If it fits, then I would be more than happy to write it for you. If it doesn't I can make it a one-shot that stands by itself. Thanks again and don't forget to leave a review!**

**~EB**


	3. Needs

**A/N: Back again! Uh, so…Yeah, it's smut, again. Sorry for those it bothers. I promise the next one will be tame! For those who like it, here ya go! **

**I just want to be clear that these one-shots all belong in the same lifetime, but don't go in order. For example, this takes place way before "The Scrapbook". I know I didn't mention the girls' ages there, but Sarah is older than Hannah. **

**Enjoy!**

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Eli sat slouched on the couch, game controller in his hands and his eyes focused on the television. This was how he spent most Saturday mornings. Clare sat beside him, also watching the TV, but rocking their two-month-old daughter, Sarah, in her arms.

"Jump over that ledge…No, go back. You missed a treasure chest," she instructed her husband.

Eli laughed and shook his head. "Do you wanna play, Clare?" he asked, his voice slightly poisonous.

"No. I like telling you what to do better," she retorted. He felt the couch shift as she got up. "Sarah's finally asleep. I'm going to put her down." Clare turned and went down the hallway, into the baby's room. It took two seconds for Eli to realize what had happened. Clare was gone. She was putting their sleeping baby into her crib. They were going to have alone time.

Between Eli's work schedule and the various visitors that came to see the baby, he and Clare hardly found time to be together when one or both of them wasn't tired. Eli not only missed time with his wife, but he missed that "special" time with her. Just the thought of making love to Clare got him excited. He paused the game and got up, following her, his sexual needs completely taking over everything else.

Eli couldn't wait to put his hands on Clare. He clenched them at his side as he stood in the hallway of their apartment, watching as she put their daughter into her crib. He licked his lips as he watched her and took a few steadying breaths. He knew that he should just walk away, go back to the video game he was playing. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see the television paused, his character mid-jump, ready to kill his opponent.

_This is more important_, he thought. He knew there was a good chance she would reject him again, but he had to take that risk. He _needed_ to take that risk.

Clare backed out of the nursery, keeping her eyes on the sleeping girl. Eli moved to stand behind her and she backed right into him. She jumped in surprise and he put his hands on her arms gently.

"Sorry I scared you," he murmured, purposely putting his lips close to her ear. He could feel Clare tense against him and he liked it. He smiled and moved them out of the doorway slowly. She turned to look up at him and Eli did his best to clear all lust from his face.

Clare smiled. "Are you done with your game?"

"For now," he whispered. Her blue eyes looked back and forth between his a few times. Eli couldn't stand the distance between them anymore and he leaned his face down to hers, crushing their lips together. He could feel her gasp against his lips and he loved that he still had that affect on her. His hands moved up and down her arms slowly, his fingertips creating goose bumps on her skin. He moved his lips down to her jaw, then her neck, eliciting a moan from her sweet lips. When his hands began to roam her body, however, she pulled her body from his lips. He buried his face in her neck and whined, keeping his eyes closed.

"How is it…" she said between breaths, "…that you always find a way…to get me against a wall?"

Eli opened his eyes and looked up at her, seeing that she was smiling, but he didn't smile back. When she realized this, she pulled back a bit to look at his face more clearly, her brow furrowed.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

Eli swallowed hard and could feel the serious look on his face. "Did you mean it when you said we would never have sex anymore?"

Clare giggled and brought her hand up to her mouth to cover it. "What?" she asked with a wide smile.

He sighed heavily and took her hand, pulling her to the end of the hall where their bedroom was. He closed the door and went to her side of the bed, turning on the baby monitor. Then, he turned to look at his wife again.

"When Sarah was born, you looked at me and you said that we were never going to have sex again."

Clare just stared at him.

"What?" he asked, his voice slightly panicked.

She stood and went to him, putting her arms around his neck. "Eli," she started. He hung his head and she lifted it slowly to look into his eyes. "When I said that, I was in an _extreme_ amount of pain. Pain that was a result of having sex with you." He swallowed hard and she shook her head. "But of course I didn't mean it. Women say ridiculous things when they're giving birth."

Eli smiled wide, feeling a little stupid, but more relieved. "Really? So you do want to have sex again?"

"Yes!" she laughed.

Eli kissed her again, passionately, his hands starting to roam her body once more. When she pulled away from him a second time, Eli nearly screamed in frustration.

"I didn't mean right now," she said, incredulously.

He sat down on the bed and put his face in his hands. "Okay," he mumbled through them. A moment later, he felt Clare move to stand between his legs. He dropped his hands and rested his face against her stomach, feeling her hands moving through his hair.

"I don't think I'm quite ready to have sex, Eli. But that doesn't mean we can't do…other things."

Eli looked at her again with a smile on his face. She smiled back and leaned down to kiss him. He put his hands on her hips and rubbed them gently, wanting desperately for the fabric on them to be gone, but he decided to let Clare set the pace, happy that he was getting any action at all.

He was surprised when Clare pushed him on to his back. With wide eyes, he watched as she moved so that she was straddling him on the bed. It was mere moments before he was hard and he knew she could feel that through his tight jeans. She leaned down and kissed him pushing her chest against his. Eli could feel that she wasn't wearing a bra and it drove him wild. His hands moved down her sides slowly until they reached the hem of her shirt. He slipped a hand under it and attempted to pull it up, but Clare sat up quickly, stopping him.

"Please don't," she pleaded, her face pink.

Eli furrowed his brow. "Why not? You said—"

She interrupted him. "I know, I know. But I'm not comfortable with that, yet. My body…doesn't look like it used to."

He frowned now. Eli had always loved Clare's body, especially when she was pregnant with their child. He knew that her body wouldn't automatically go back to the way it was before, but that didn't stop him from being ridiculously attracted to her.

"Clare, you're beautiful."

She blushed a deeper red and looked away from him. "Eli—"

"You're fucking sexy," he interrupted.

Clare looked back at him with wide eyes. "Even with all of this fat and extra skin?" She raised her eyebrows a bit.

Eli reached up with one hand and stroked her cheek. "No matter what, you will always be sexy to me."

With a small smile, she reached down and pulled her t-shirt up over her head, causing Eli's eyes to bug out of his head even more. It was the first time he had seen her bare breasts full on since Sarah was born.

Eli reached up to touch them and Clare's voice made him hesitate. "Gently," she murmured. He nodded and moved again, concentrating on making his movements slow. He cupped her breast to his palm and he smiled at how heavy it felt. He took one thumb and brushed it carefully across her nipple, licking his lips as he did. He sat up and moved Clare so that she was sitting on his lap. Eli kissed her bare shoulders and chest, kissing one breast around the nipple and then the other. His lips made their way back up to her mouth and he kissed her passionately, their tongues meeting, causing both of them to moan. He moved his hands up and down her bare back. His erection demanded his attention and he groaned, pulling away.

"So…what _can_ we do?" he asked, his need apparent in his voice.

Clare looked at him a moment before getting up off of his lap. Eli opened his mouth in protest, but she spoke before he could.

"Lie down on the bed."

He looked at her before hurrying to situate himself on the bed. He turned and rested his head on the pillows, his eyes glued to her. Clare climbed onto the bed and stopped at his waist. She unbuckled his belt and pulled it off, tossing it to the floor. Eli's eyes glazed over as he watched her undo the button of his jeans and pull down the zipper. He automatically lifted his hips and she pulled his tight jeans down. He kicked them off and she moved to sit between his legs.

Clare smiled sexily as she traced the outline of Eli's erection through his boxer briefs, causing him to moan. His eyes closed now and he pushed his head into the pillows, fighting the urge to thrust up at her touch. He felt her reach into his underwear and pull his cock out. He licked his lips and, when he looked at her again, her deep blue eyes looked back at him. She moved so that her mouth was an inch from him and he swallowed hard, feeling like he was seventeen once more. Clare's perfectly pink tongue left her mouth and licked the head of his erection, clouding his mind. His eyes rolled into his head and he just closed them, his hands at his sides and gripping the comforter on the bed.

He could feel all of her mouth on him now, working expertly. He wouldn't last long and knew that she would be grateful. It had been a long time since she had gone down on him and the sensation was a lot for him to handle after not having had it in months. Eli brought one hand up and buried it in her hair, tugging softly when he knew he was about to cum. She got the hint and sped up, not faltering when he came into her mouth.

"Clare! Fuck!" he cried out as he came and he brought his free hand to his mouth, biting it to keep from shouting again. He never could be quiet.

She swallowed everything and tucked him away before crawling up his body and lying beside him. He remained still for a long time, breathing heavily. When he could finally think past the fog in his mind, he turned his head to kiss her forehead.

"Do you want…me to….?" he asked, trailing off, his breathing still ragged. She shook her head and placed a kiss on his neck.

"No. I don't think I'm quite ready for that. Soon, though."

Eli didn't protest, just nodded his head. "M'kay, babe," he said, his voice weak.

She was quiet for a long time and Eli thought that she might have fallen asleep. He opened his eyes to look at her and she was staring at the wall. His brow furrowed.

"Clare? You all right?" he asked.

She smiled softly and looked up at him. "Did you mean it when you said that I would be sexy no matter what? Or were you just trying to get me to take my clothes off?"

"I just wanted you to get naked," he said, shrugging. She hit his arm playfully and he was grateful that she didn't take him seriously. "What I meant was…I will always always _always_ find you sexy." He kissed her forehead again. "You will always be attractive to me." He kissed her cheek. "You will always be cute to me." He kissed the tip of her nose, causing her to smile wide. "You will always be beautiful to me." He kissed her lips gently before cupping her cheek with his hand and looking into her eyes. "Always."

.

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**I cannot wait until October 8****th****. Less than two weeks away now. **

**Please please please leave a review. Even if it's tiny!**

**I am still looking for suggestions or requests! It makes me a little more motivated!**

**~EB**


	4. Her Old Self

**A/N: Here's a short one. Thanks to** **balseirocharmed for the inspiration! I hope I did your idea justice!**

**Enjoy!**

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Clare looked at herself in the full-length mirror and sighed, going to her closet. She pulled out another shirt and took off the one she wore, exchanging them. When she went to the mirror again, she smiled as she examined herself. Her eyes stopped at the cross around her neck and she frowned. She touched it gently with her fingertips, then wrapped her hand around it. She tensed her arm, ready to pull it from her neck, when she heard dogs barking down the street. She pulled back the sheer curtains that covered her window and saw Eli walking towards her house, no longer in school uniform.

The cross on her neck forgotten, Clare moved from the window, checking her appearance in the mirror once more, before going down the stairs to the front door.

When she opened it, Eli's fist was up in the air, poised to knock on the door. He dropped it and half-smiled at her, repositioning the bookbag on his shoulder. Clare looked into his green eyes and found it hard to remember why he wasn't automatically pulling her into an embrace.

"Are you going to let me in, Edwards?" he asked, raising his eyebrows.

Clare blinked a few times before nodding. "Yeah, of course. Come in." She moved aside so that he could come in and she shut the door behind him.

"Are your parents home?" he asked, his voice dangerously low.

She turned to look at him. "Mom!" she called out. "Eli and I will be upstairs studying."

"Okay," she heard her mother call back. "Keep your door open."

_Don't worry, Mom_, she thought. _Nothing's going to happen anyway._

Clare remembered, now, why she wasn't in Eli's arms—he was an idiot. After what happened the night of the Vegas dance, Clare went to her grandmother's house and didn't speak to Eli. Adam told her that he would be suspended for his involvement with Fitz and Clare was glad. Their time apart gave her a lot of time to think. She really liked Eli, but she wasn't sure he was right for her. She had enough drama in her life. She didn't need to worry about having a boyfriend that was constantly looking for trouble.

She didn't want to be alone with him, but she promised that she would help him get caught up on the school work that he missed while he was suspended. She knew that he would be fine, that he was super smart and didn't need her help, but when he asked, she couldn't refuse. Her one stipulation was that Adam would be there, too, but Adam called her after school that afternoon to say that his mother was making him stay home. Clare couldn't tell if he was being truthful or not, but she let it go anyway.

Clare looked at Eli and his eyebrows were still raised. She could feel a blush creep onto her cheeks and she led the way up to her bedroom silently. When they entered, she left the door open and sat down at her desk. She heard him sit down on the floor.

"Is this okay?" he asked, his voice softer than usual. Clare turned to look at him and her heart melted a bit at the sight. His knees were pulled up to his chest, his green eyes full of apology. She nodded and resisted the urge to go to him and hug him, saying that all was forgiven.

"It's fine," she said softly and turned back towards her desk.

"Can I have something to write on?" His voice was still pitiful.

She rolled her eyes and reached towards the bookcase beside her, pulling out a thick yearbook.

"Here you go." She handed it to him, without looking into his eyes this time. She opened her bag and pulled out her homework, going to work. She could hear him moving around behind her on the floor as he got his homework out as well. Clare frowned when she heard him sigh softly, but she didn't turn around.

The pair worked for an hour before Clare felt like she couldn't stand the silence anymore. She looked at the math homework in front of her and realized she had solved two problems. Sighing heavily, she got up from her desk and went towards her bedroom door, feeling Eli's eyes on her.

"I'll be right back," she muttered as she left the room and turned the corner, going into the bathroom. She shut the door and put her hands on the sink to steady herself.

_Pull yourself together, Clare_, she thought. _ He's just a boy. Just an incredibly cute, ridiculously smart, and very sexy boy. Who is a trouble-maker. Even though you sort of like that about him. Even though liking that gets you into trouble. Am I seriously arguing with myself about this?_

Clare laughed out loud involuntarily and blushed when she realized how loud it was. She shook her head and sighed.

When she left the bathroom, she felt like things were unresolved with herself. She didn't know how to feel about Eli. She knew that she really liked him, but she didn't know if she liked him enough. She went back into her bedroom and stopped in the doorway as she looked at Eli. He was still sitting on the floor, but his homework was no longer in front of him. He had the yearbook she gave him open on his lap and he was looking at a page full of photos.

"Eli," she said, a bit of warning in her voice, even though she knew it was too late.

Eli looked up at her with a wide smile on his face. "I never would have recognized you."

Clare frowned and went to him, sitting on the floor and putting her back against the bed. She reluctantly looked over at the open page and her eyes were immediately drawn to the photo of her from her freshman year at Degrassi. She recognized the girl, even though Eli said she couldn't—long, straight hair and glasses, still in her old school uniform, a dorky expression on her face.

"You were cute," he commented. Clare looked at him with daggers in her eyes. "What?" he asked, looking surprised. "You were! I like your look better now, though."

She looked back and forth between his green eyes, her face feeling flush from his intense stare. She looked down at her knees and shrugged.

"I was a different girl back then."

Eli closed the yearbook and turned his body so that he was facing her. "What do you mean?"

She shrugged again. "My beliefs were different; my life was different. Darcy had just gone to Kenya and my parents became more open about their…disagreements. I had my first boyfriend." She stopped and looked at Eli, realizing that statement made him a little uncomfortable. She smiled inside. "I had my first kiss…" Eli licked his lips now and looked down at his hands. "I had my heart broken and I needed a change. So I cut my hair and got laser eye surgery. I'm glad I'm not that girl anymore."

Eli looked up at her, into her eyes, and she felt breathless for a moment. She saw him struggle slightly to say something and she found it endearing and a little powerful. She liked having that effect on him.

Finally, he spoke, his voice soft and low. "Would the old you have forgiven me for being such an idiot?"

Clare took her lower lip into her mouth and chewed it softly.

"No, I don't think she would have."

Eli blinked a few times and looked down again.

"But I will," she said, smiling. He looked up at her and smiled back.

"Really?"

"Do you promise to never fight with a bully again?" she asked.

"No."

Clare widened her eyes. "Wh—Eli…Do you even want to change?"

He sighed heavily now. "Of course I do! But I can't promise that I won't do something _ever_ again. And asking me to is unfair."

She nodded, realizing he was right.

"But," he continued. "I do promise to protect you. And to _try_ to change. I want to make this work, Clare. I really like you. A lot."

Eli's green eyes looked at her intensely and she had no choice but to give in—she realized she liked him way too much to give up. When she didn't say anything, he reached up and cupped her cheek softly with his hand before leaning in and kissing her lips chastely. Clare felt the butterflies move wildly through her stomach again and she was glad to have them back. Eli tilted his head and kissed her again, pressing his lips to hers as if he couldn't get enough of them. She felt Eli open his mouth and she tensed, suddenly entering unknown territory. She felt him reach out and touch her bottom lip with his tongue gently. Instinctually, she opened her mouth, wanting to touch her tongue to his. She did and felt herself get breathless at the sensation it caused throughout her body.

Clare pulled back, her face flushed, breathing heavily. "I've…never done that…before…"

Eli smiled and lowered a hand to her hip. "You were good at it."

She blushed a fiercer red and looked down.

"So, I'm forgiven?" he asked.

Clare looked back up at him and smiled before leaning in to kiss him again, hoping that would be answer enough.

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**Thanks for reading! Reviews are always appreciated.**

**Is it October 8****th****, yet? **

**~EB**


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